Dec 8th

Lucas continues to show signs of improvement.

• His bilirubin count is down to 14.
• They have been lowering his pressure settings
• He has been eating and pooping well

We seem to be on the same track we put together yesterday.  Maybe another 4 days on the vent.  Then we get to hear him cry.  This may seem to be a slight anomaly in my life right now but, my son is totally silent.  For parents that might sound like an awesome solution.  But, in truth it is somewhat frightening.  He just gets really angry.  No matter what you do to him its hard to tell if you are doing anything right.  I can only imagine what a deaf parent must feel with their children.  You are missing a main component of feedback that is so necessary for figuring out if you are even moving in the right direction to comfort your child.

So far this has backfired a couple times for me.  I held Lucas, he was heavier than my daughter had been.  But, he is also covered with tubes and wires.  Its a little tricky and I tend to make him angry.  Seems that no matter what I try that makes things somewhat worse.  Either you are holding his feet screwing up the PICC line or you forget about the respirator hose and it starts to pull out setting off alarms and then nurses pop up asking if everything is alright. Its really a circus and in any other time and place it might even be comical.  But, right now its just a little frustrating.  This is ok, I know, after we get past the tube, he will be able to yell at me like any other infant.

What is nice, is that he is acting like a regular baby.  He gets gas and cranky.  He seems to be up an looking around every now and then.  His swelling went down on his face so he seems to not have a problem opening his eyes anymore.  Here is my best picture of his mom holding him.